From my article titled MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT TEMPERAMENT 1, I was talking about how Birth order influences or tweaks our temperament. I will like to start this article on that note.
It is important to also note that you can not be double Sanguine , or solely Choleric. Neither can you be fully Melancholy nor completely a phlegmatic. It has to be a blend of two temperaments with one being the primary temperament while the second remains the secondary temperament ( more on that later )
Back to birth order. Birth order affects temperament a lot. No matter your blend of temperament, if you are a first born, first son or first daughter, you are prone to be leader-like in your approach to life - it is inborn. That trait is present in every first born. Hence If you are not careful, you are prone to hastily conclude that such person has a choleric blend whereas, he/she is just exhibiting the first born trait.
However, it is also possible to be a first born and a choleric at the same time. For instance, my wife is a choleric and a first born at the same time ; that looks like a " double choleric " to me. If you are married to a first born child , understand that first borns don't like being told what to do. They don't like receiving orders, instead, they enjoy giving orders. Note that they are not trying to be stubborn or unnecessarily difficult, its just inherent in first borns - that is why we all need the Holy Spirit to help us regulate our tempraments so our weakneses wouldn't wreck our lives.
Secondly, on this note, I will like to talk about Last borns. Hmmm, last borns!!! Last borns by nature don't take things so serious as it is the case with first borns. Their philosophy is " take things easy "Though they are fun to be with, they consciously or unconsciously wait for others to make decisions for them. I can go on and on, but judging from the traits mentioned above, one can easily mistaken a choleric for a phlegmatic , just because he/she is exhibiting the traits of last borns. In essence, the choleric traits will be there , but the last born traits will always interfere with that of the choleric making such persons behave like phlegmatics momentarily.
Therefore, a first born chlor/San can relate to life quite differently from the way a last born chlor/San does. That is why we need to understand these things with precision so we don't get confused along the line. Either you are a first born or a last born, your basic temperaments remains and will not change but you can have such interferences as occasion demands and that will be a direct result of your birth order.
What of middle borns? The middle borns are quite stable and their temperaments are the easiest to identify. Come to think of it, you are not First and you are not Last, what would you rather be ? You just want to be your original self all the time. That is why middle borns spring surprises in families often times ( more on birth order later )
In conclusion , never assume your temperament; get to know it for yourself. Don't wait for someone to do it for you. Get hold of all the books written by Tim Lahaye on Temperament right away. You can start with " WHY YOU ACT THE WAY YOU DO "
Watch out for my post titled MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT TEMPERAMENT 3 .
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The truth about sex must be told and preached in all churches worldwide. The reality is that people especially holiness preachers don't talk about (sex) at all.
Whenever (sex) is mentioned, then people get offended and begin to murmur and make negative comments about it. Yet those people are the very personalities living in one sexual sin or the other.
There is no way any holiness preacher can preach true holiness to God's satisfaction without teaching the pew about their sexuality , the careless use of sex, and the dangers involved and assume all will be well.
People need to be enlightened about the sin that has dominated the age. The sin that has captured the youths in the church, the sin that has brought teenage pregnancies and abortions.
There is something both the aged and the infant do not know anything about. The church also has closed her eyes on this particular issue. Nobody wants to talk about it but it is very real.
In case you are not aware my brethren, I want to tell you that:
*SEXUAL IMMORALITY*
Is the last bullet the kingdom of darkness has thrown against the church of God, and the church is wounded very sore that there seems to be no cure or remedy.
I want to make it so clear and not in jargons or vocabularies that, you cannot count the number of people who go to church and proclaim the name of God , that are still living in immorality. They may either be suffering from lust, masturbation, pornography, adultery, incest, homosexual, and lesbianism, sodomy, bestiality and many more which time will fail me to mention.
Hardly will you come across a young lady who has not been misused by 'so called boyfriends'.
And every guy is now dating because of sex. God is watching all those that are having sex with people they haven't married.
It's a headache for God seeing his own created people perishing in a sin called sexual immorality. How many young men today in the church can you count and point fingers at that fornication has not pulled down?
A pastor slept with his junior pastor's wife, impregnated her, and used the name of God to defend himself that it was God who instructed him to do so.
If (sex) that is supposed to be between husband and wives only, is now between father and daughter in the church, do I need to tell you there is fire on the mountain?? If (sex) that is only legalized between a man and his wife, is now between a guy and his girlfriend, do you need angels to come and sound the warning against sexual immorality?
If (sex) that is a sacred thing in marriage has become a desecrated thing in dating, what else do you want before you prepare the way of the Lord??
*PASTOR, WHY ARE YOU Quiet???
*
Cry aloud, spare not. And tell the house of Jacob their sins, and Israel their transgressions . Pastor why are you not crying aloud?! Why are you so mute like ELI ?? Heaven is shedding tears over the perishing souls every day and you are there raising funds every Sunday to build bigger auditorium.
You call your members for anointing services and prayer meetings without urging sin out of them.
Some are living together with men that did not pay any dowry on them. Some commit abortions and cover it up. Some are lesbians and homosexuals . What are you doing about that??
Where has the word of God that says "flee fornication" gone to in your Bible? From henceforth, if you don't take this warning and start declaring war against this strange spirit that has taken over the church, you'll have questions to answer.
And to those who claim they love holiness messages with negligence to this particular truth about sex have actually missed the mark.
*AND YOU! CHURCH MEMBER*
To be active in church and still be committing immorality, God is watching you.
To be a child of God and still having a boyfriend or girlfriend, God is watching you.
To be a choir member or youth leader and still be doing what the married are doing, if u like continue.
YOUR GROUP MEMBERS NEED THIS MESSAGE. YOUR FRIENDS AND ENEMIES ALSO NEED IT. KEEP SHARING UNTIL IT SAVE A SOUL FROM THE BONDAGE, AND DANGER OF HELL FIRE, AND GOD WILL BLESS YOU FOR THAT IN JESUS NAME.
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To maintain a healthy vagina you must know what to do to avoid infection and it is equally important to educate your sexual partner on some of them to also help you help the vagina.
Here are some few things you can do or avoid.
1. Fingering 
During foreplay or romance, as part of it some people insert their finger or fingers into the vagina. The question is, how many people wash their hands before sexual intercourse? Some people do not even keep their nails clean so it gathers a lot of germs and during the fingering, these germs are deposited in the vagina...leading to infection. Same thing apply to autopleasure acts or masturbation.
2. Anal sex
I am not here to tell anybody to have anal sex or not to but I simply want to draw the attention of those who engage in anal sex with the opposite sex that it is dangerous to have anal sex and continue having penovaginal sex. If this is done, the penis will pick bacteria from the anus and deliver them to the vagina even if you are using a condom....which will lead to infection.
3. Quest to make the vagina TIGHT
Some guys complain bitterly about the vagina of their sexual partners. They complain that it's too big and they no more feel any sensation during intercourse. Some ladies are therefore pushed to find a quick solution and in the process some use herbs or other substances in the vagina with the hope of making the vagina tight. Some of the substances cause infection or sepsis. Some of the herbs can cause the vagina to get tighter to the extent that penetration is no more possible. This will require treatment.
4. Douching 
Some parents, when bathing for their baby girls put warm water in a milk tin or dip a towel in the warm water and pour the water through a hole made beneath the tin or squeeze the water out of the towel into the vagina of the baby. This is sooooo WRONG as it can damage the hymen.
Some parents also insert ginger or pepper or both into the vagina of adolescents as a form of punishment. This is sooooo WRONG as it can lead to infection.
Some people are use to bathing by adding dettol or other detergents to the water and they put this solution inside the vagina with the help of sponge or towel or just the hand with soap to clean the vagina. This is soooo WRONG as it will change the normal flora in the vagina, leading to infection.
5. Use of water closet
Some people have the habit of not sitting on the seat of the WC when using it so they end up urinating on the seat. The possibility of picking infection when using it in that condition is high. Don't let your pant be at the thigh level when using the WC especially the public ones as the inner of the pant may rub the surface of the WC. Where the water is not running and people have used but have not flushed and you don't have any choice but to also use it, use enough toilet roll to cover before using the WC to avoid any splashes on the vulva.
6. Washing and drying 
Develop the habit of disinfecting your panties frequently...depending on the number of pants you have. Keep exclusive panties to wear whenever you are menstruating and don't mix those panties with your regular panties. Pay particular attention to those panties when washing. Ensure that the panties are made of cotton and are dried in the sun or well ironed to kill germs.
7. Change sanitary pads
Some people try to economize the use of their sanitary pads so during the period they tend to still wear the pad because there is little or no blood. This is soooo WRONG as it can lead to infection.
NB: If there is any bad scent from the vagina or there is a discharge coming from the vagina then it might be an infection which you have to have it treated.
Help save the vagina by ensuring that you get the message to as many friends as possible. Help save the vagina by getting the message to your sexual partner or sisters.
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1. Have I married the wrong spouse? I and my spouse don't see eye to eye; we fight too much.
ANS: Disagreement is normal in marriage. Every couple disagree from time to time. However, how we handle disagreement and conflict differs, that is what create abuse and fights. Learn conflict resolution skills. Learn how to air your opinion respectably. Don't shout, yell, abuse or scream at your spouse when you are angry. If the discussion is getting heated, take a break. Look for somewhere to calm down. Think over the problem, try to understand your spouse's point of view then re approach the matter in a better way and in a calmer environment where your spouse can listen to you...
2.QUES : My husband always ask for sex and would not take NO for an answer.
ANS: Men are wired differently from women and his sex drive is higher than yours hence the regular NEED for sex. His demand is not abnormal at all. Read books on men's physiology and psychological make up. Read good books on sex, they will help you a lot. Learn to welcome him every time he needs you and if you are busy or sick, respectably and lovingly explain to him with a promise to make up as soon as you are less busy and well. Telling a man no all the time hurts and affects his self esteem. He feels rejected, unwanted and unloved.
3: QUES: My wife wastes resources...
ANS: every family should have a budget and must be disciplined enough to stick to it. When there is a budget and both parties are disciplined to follow it to the letter, waste can easily be curbed. Lack of financial plan and budget lead to waste. Does she know how much you earn sir? If she doesn't, she might make a big demand on you and spend lavishly thinking she can always get more from you. Women, being emotional beings easily buy on the spur of the moment and how that product makes them feel not what they really need. As women, we should always leave home with a list of all items we want to buy so we won't buy unnecessary things and allow a sugar coated tongued marketer/seller pressure us to buy things we really don't need. We must learn to manage resources well so our husbands can trust us and commit more resources in our hands. (To be continued). Compliments of the season. God bless you. Cheers!
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1. As a lady, you are at least 23 years old and the man is at least 25 years old.
2. You have a job/ business that can take care of you, your wife and at least a baby.
3. As a man you have your own apartment and you pay all your bills by yourself.
4. As a lady, you can take good care of yourself and another person without any stress.
4. You love children and hope to have yours.
5. You enjoy cooking and do house chores without being told.
6. You can live at least a thousand miles away from your parents.
7. You can make major decisions about your life and face the consequence.
8. You are no longer under the control and command of your parents.
9. You do not yield to peer pressure. You do what needs to be done regardless of what anyone feels.
10. You are sexually responsible. You know how to say NO to premarital sex and mean it.
11. As a lady you have a good relationship with your dad and you are submissive to authorities.
12. As a man, you love your mum, sisters and treat women generally with respect and dignity.
13. You know how to make and multiply money.
14. You are spiritually sound. You pray and receive answers to your prayers. You know how to hear God.
15. You are generous. You give with pleasure.
16. You have a healthy sexual desire.
17. You know exactly what you want in life and you pursue it daily to attain it.
18. You have a strong desire to love, bond with and help another person be all what God wants them to be.
19. You do not have destructive bad habits.
20. You are in full grip of your emotions. You are not hot tempered, lustful and possessive!
These and more are the signs you are ready for marriage. Marriage requires all round maturity: physical, social, financial, mental, emotional, psychological. It is not compulsory you must marry at 25.
Wait till you are mature or your immaturity will destroy your marriage. I see it happen all the time. May the Lord grant you understanding. 


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Kegel exercises strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, which support the uterus, bladder, small intestine and rectum. You can do Kegel exercises, also known as pelvic floor muscle training, just about anytime.
Please note the following
There are many factors that can weaken your pelvic floor muscles, including:
1. Pregnancy, 
2. Childbirth, 
3. Surgery, 
4. Aging,
5. Excessive straining from constipation 
6. Chronic coughing, 
7. Being overweight.
You might benefit from doing Kegel exercises if you:
1. Leak a few drops of urine while sneezing, laughing or coughing (stress incontinence).
2. Have a strong, sudden urge to urinate just before losing a large amount of urine (urinary incontinence).
3. Leak stool (fecal incontinence)
Normally, Kegel exercises can be done
1. During pregnancy or 
2. After childbirth to try to prevent urinary incontinence.
Please note
1. Kegel exercises are less helpful for women who have severe urine leakage when they sneeze, cough or laugh.
2. Also, Kegel exercises aren't helpful for women who unexpectedly leak small amounts of urine due to a full bladder (overflow incontinence).
How to do Kegel exercises
1. Find the right muscles. To identify your pelvic floor muscles, stop urination in midstream. If you succeed, you've got the right muscles. Once you've identified your pelvic floor muscles you can do the exercises in any position, although you might find it easiest to do them lying down at first.
2. Perfect your technique. Tighten your pelvic floor muscles, hold the contraction for five seconds, and then relax for five seconds. Try it four or five times in a row. Work up to keeping the muscles contracted for 10 seconds at a time, relaxing for 10 seconds between contractions.
3. 
Maintain your focus. For best results, focus on tightening only your pelvic floor muscles. Be careful not to flex the muscles in your abdomen, thighs or buttocks. Avoid holding your breath. Instead, breathe freely during the exercises.
Repeat three times a day. Aim for at least three sets of 10 repetitions a day.
4. Don't make a habit of using Kegel exercises to start and stop your urine stream.
5. Doing Kegel exercises while emptying your bladder can actually lead to incomplete emptying of the bladder — which increases the risk of a urinary tract infection.
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